It has been a rough week already, My husband found out Monday that his position at his job (he's worked at for 12 years) was eliminated. 12 years of hard work, he went to school while working there full time and most of the time overtime. He graduated with a 3.3 GPA, drove a hr each way to work...and then applied for a higher position (the one he has worked for the past 4 years) And Monday all those years and hard work ....were ended taken away. We're worried, and figuring it all out and really just in shock. He's looking for something new, and i'm trying to keep it together and be positive. Life is crappy sometimes....it will all work out. I have the very best guy by my side.
The start of it all, almost 8 years ago now...
Almost 5 year ago on our wedding day.
4th of July this year <3
But to get on with my first point of this blog. I had a dream Monday night (the day we learned of Kenny's job loss). And that dream was so real, and vivid and wonderful of my Carrie. I've had a few dreams about her, a few bad scary ones, and a few good ones... I'm glad this was another good one. This was a simple one of us being together and goofing around, and i said its been a long time, and she turned and said yes its been way way way to long....
And as i awoke i felt like crying for multiple reasons. My life as i know it is upside down. My husband has worked hard his entire adult life, we have both worked hard to get to where we're at. Homeowners, we have pets, and nice stuff, and decent used cars..etc... We've built our life and now its upside down. And also felt like crying because it was just a dream, i will never get to have that conversation with her, i will never get to see her smile or hear her laugh again. So as life takes these weird twists and turns i will learn to grow from them, i will learn my own strength that has grown so much in this past year. I know that the going will still be hard, But together with our friends and family for support we can make it thru anything...
-Clarissa
As I sit here and read this it brings me to tears, not because its sad, even though it is sad and scary and all kinds of other emotions, but because it fills my heart with joy the love you an Kenny have for each other. I can't even explain how greatful I am you have this love in your life. Even though this is a scary time in your life I have no doubt that Kenny will always take care of you and be there for you and continue to always be the amazing person that he is! I think back to your wedding when he started to cry when he was saying his vows. I knew then like I know now that he will always love you the way you deserved to be loved. As you've grown up youve turned out better than i could of ever imagined, you are such an amazing person. And even though there other things important in life, if theres anything I could of wished for you is for you to know love the way you do! I love you both and even though it will be rough, I have no doubt it will all work out!
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